Image source: http://www.blogcadre.com/files/images/superheroes.jpg
Bruce Wayne is rich and has an R&D lab for himself besides the geeky Morgan Freeman for support. Superman was born super and Spiderman has Kirsten Dunst. Ironman has everything! I have none of these, but we all have one thing in common: The desire to remove the wrong-doers from the society.
So I was thinking, seriously, if I wanted to be a vigilante fighting evil, how would I go about it? This would be an herculean effort for someone like me who spends 18 of 24 hours a day in front of the computer. At 5'9" and 70 kgs with a pot belly, there are a lot of questions that need to be answered when attempting to indulge in such radical behavior. Off the hat, I need to figure:
1) Do I model myself after known super-heroes or do I create a new avatar?
Since I am making all this effort in real life, I might as well take some credit for it by creating a new brand of Vigilantism. This could help me financially in terms of merchandise, comic books, movie rights and such (too much to ask?).
2) What costume will I wear - underwear over pants or pants over underwear?
Tight fighting spandex that will make my belly and genitals stand out is not an option. However, I do need something that will help create an identity besides being comfortable for all the action. A logo that stands out is an absolute must (or is it?).
3) Where can I get the costume made?
This will be a good opportunity to learn fashion designing. Practically speaking, walking around in plain clothes would be easy to morph in and out of my vigilante personality but this would kill my disguise if spotted and also remove the opportunity to spread message by nature of my visual identity.
4) How will I get my message across to the public?
Graffiti is not practical, nor are focused beams with bat (replace with any other logo I come up with) cut-out masks. Cannot make direct contact with media, I fear cops being able to track me down. Anonymous emails also seem to be traceable (Help me out geeks!) these days. Publishing pamphlets is also not practical, I could be turned in for a reward by the publisher. Home printed messages randomly thrown around in the city might not be effective in communicating the message besides adding to the existing garbage and cows on the roads.
5) How can I evade the cops?
This is a tough one. The Indian law enforcement is very vulnerable to bribery and I will need to build good contacts to weasel my way out of the situation if I am caught. This is not practical. Besides, most of the thugs have good rapport with the cops. I don't think I can financially disturb the relationship between cops and the thugs. Needs more thinking.
6) What weapons can I gain access to and how I will I beat up professional thugs?
I have no illusions about my physical skills. With no formal training with weapons and a body that can at best push a heavy table, this is going to be one of the toughest challenges in becoming a vigilante. Either I go get myself trained physically and with weapons or I rely on brains and chemicals to put down the enemy (Perhaps the writers of Christopher Crocodile could help me with this). At present I own steel-handle kitchen knives in 3 sizes and a 100$ Japanese sword made in San Francisco that looks real but is functionally untested.
7) What will be my mode of transport?
This will be essential for fast getaways. I don't have the expertise to custom design street-illegal vehicles. I would love to hack and use one of those tanks the Indian army has put for display in various road junctions in Bangalore. But that is just a fantasy. I could use my 2 wheeler, but then I will have to remove the number plates. However, my bike is just not cut out for fast escapes on bad roads besides being not armored to withstand bullets.
8) How do I select my targets?
All said and done, whom am I fighting against? At the frontlines of the Indian society are the auto-drivers (3 wheeled cabs in India) who make life miserable by refusing to use government specified fares for travel, demanding double-fare or simply refusing to come to destination of the passenger's choice. Then there are corrupt cops and other government officials. Politicians mostly being disguised thugs are important targets but they might be hard to gain access to (what with me reading the news item that the government spends Rs. 250 crores every year in VIP security. Most politicians turn out to be VIPs in front of the mirror). This question will need serious thinking and good strategies. Choosing targets needs careful planning and escape strategies.
9) What are the ethical boundaries in becoming a vigilante?
While wanting to bring about change via violence, I would like to think of myself as a peaceful man. I don't want to kill or injure anyone permanently but no guarantees can be made when deciding to indulge in such dangerous methods as vigilantism. Pepper spray with a message would be ideal but I doubt if it can motivate people to change.
10) What is my motivation?
A) Watchmen. B) All the corruption and bureaucracy, greed for power and money and the feeling of even a common man is this country about being able to get away with wrong doing (I feel this too, else why would I decide to become a vigilante?) needs cleansing. The question is: Can I clean this society? Vigilantism is an option I am looking into.
This is just the beginning. So many more details to be thought about and plans put into place before the belly gets any bigger. Suggestions and questions are welcome.
So I was thinking, seriously, if I wanted to be a vigilante fighting evil, how would I go about it? This would be an herculean effort for someone like me who spends 18 of 24 hours a day in front of the computer. At 5'9" and 70 kgs with a pot belly, there are a lot of questions that need to be answered when attempting to indulge in such radical behavior. Off the hat, I need to figure:
1) Do I model myself after known super-heroes or do I create a new avatar?
Since I am making all this effort in real life, I might as well take some credit for it by creating a new brand of Vigilantism. This could help me financially in terms of merchandise, comic books, movie rights and such (too much to ask?).
2) What costume will I wear - underwear over pants or pants over underwear?
Tight fighting spandex that will make my belly and genitals stand out is not an option. However, I do need something that will help create an identity besides being comfortable for all the action. A logo that stands out is an absolute must (or is it?).
3) Where can I get the costume made?
This will be a good opportunity to learn fashion designing. Practically speaking, walking around in plain clothes would be easy to morph in and out of my vigilante personality but this would kill my disguise if spotted and also remove the opportunity to spread message by nature of my visual identity.
4) How will I get my message across to the public?
Graffiti is not practical, nor are focused beams with bat (replace with any other logo I come up with) cut-out masks. Cannot make direct contact with media, I fear cops being able to track me down. Anonymous emails also seem to be traceable (Help me out geeks!) these days. Publishing pamphlets is also not practical, I could be turned in for a reward by the publisher. Home printed messages randomly thrown around in the city might not be effective in communicating the message besides adding to the existing garbage and cows on the roads.
5) How can I evade the cops?
This is a tough one. The Indian law enforcement is very vulnerable to bribery and I will need to build good contacts to weasel my way out of the situation if I am caught. This is not practical. Besides, most of the thugs have good rapport with the cops. I don't think I can financially disturb the relationship between cops and the thugs. Needs more thinking.
6) What weapons can I gain access to and how I will I beat up professional thugs?
I have no illusions about my physical skills. With no formal training with weapons and a body that can at best push a heavy table, this is going to be one of the toughest challenges in becoming a vigilante. Either I go get myself trained physically and with weapons or I rely on brains and chemicals to put down the enemy (Perhaps the writers of Christopher Crocodile could help me with this). At present I own steel-handle kitchen knives in 3 sizes and a 100$ Japanese sword made in San Francisco that looks real but is functionally untested.
7) What will be my mode of transport?
This will be essential for fast getaways. I don't have the expertise to custom design street-illegal vehicles. I would love to hack and use one of those tanks the Indian army has put for display in various road junctions in Bangalore. But that is just a fantasy. I could use my 2 wheeler, but then I will have to remove the number plates. However, my bike is just not cut out for fast escapes on bad roads besides being not armored to withstand bullets.
8) How do I select my targets?
All said and done, whom am I fighting against? At the frontlines of the Indian society are the auto-drivers (3 wheeled cabs in India) who make life miserable by refusing to use government specified fares for travel, demanding double-fare or simply refusing to come to destination of the passenger's choice. Then there are corrupt cops and other government officials. Politicians mostly being disguised thugs are important targets but they might be hard to gain access to (what with me reading the news item that the government spends Rs. 250 crores every year in VIP security. Most politicians turn out to be VIPs in front of the mirror). This question will need serious thinking and good strategies. Choosing targets needs careful planning and escape strategies.
9) What are the ethical boundaries in becoming a vigilante?
While wanting to bring about change via violence, I would like to think of myself as a peaceful man. I don't want to kill or injure anyone permanently but no guarantees can be made when deciding to indulge in such dangerous methods as vigilantism. Pepper spray with a message would be ideal but I doubt if it can motivate people to change.
10) What is my motivation?
A) Watchmen. B) All the corruption and bureaucracy, greed for power and money and the feeling of even a common man is this country about being able to get away with wrong doing (I feel this too, else why would I decide to become a vigilante?) needs cleansing. The question is: Can I clean this society? Vigilantism is an option I am looking into.
This is just the beginning. So many more details to be thought about and plans put into place before the belly gets any bigger. Suggestions and questions are welcome.
(I realize the irony of having exposed myself with my name and intentions. If not me, then this should help someone else with a similar motivation to get started, unless, I can break the irony. Think!)
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kewl write-up..kudos
Here is another thought that hit me almost immediately while I read through....Swami Vigilananda might work well considering the popularity, might and support Swamijis enjoy...though u may then want to think of an image makeover once you expand bases to other countries..